Balance

Y'know, we have a three day weekend coming up.
I asked my hubby if he has that day off. He answered yes, and then asked if I had a bunch of stuff planned.
Truthfully? No.
My honey-do list is fifty miles long, thanks in part to the pregnancy. I just can't do as much as I used to, not so much because of my baby bump, but because of the sheer exhaustion and muscle wasting from being sick so long. I can't BELIEVE what a wuss I've become!
Then, also, it would not be fair to take up a rare vacation day with nothing but work. He has worked so hard, he needs a day for some fun. We may have a rainy day that day, but still...
However, it would also not be fair to just play the whole weekend. I mean, c'mon, if it doesn't get done now, it will just get shunted to some other weekend, and the longer we delay, the more frantic and stressed we'll be. We have to do SOMETHING.
So where do you strike the balance? Obviously, we're not working on Sunday. That's the Lord's day. Neither are we going off to play that day. That isn't right either. So we have Saturday, and Monday.
Well, the obvious choice to me is to get starting on the work Friday evening, finish it off Saturday, and then play on Monday. But what if that doesn't work out? What if it rains? Taea and I are already sick, too, what if he get sick by Monday and we spend all day lying around miserable?
Ah, decisions, decisions.
I guess that's just the chance we take. We have to make a list, and make sure we get the items of highest priority done. What is surprising is that those items may not be the obvious ones. You'd think that getting the house spic-and-span would be top priority. Granted, we need to make sure the basics are taken care of, like dishes and laundry. But then, there's the clutter all over the house. And with two kids, any mess that is cleaned up is re-created in five minutes or less.
So...what to do with them? Send them outside? Natch, that's an obvious answer for most homes. Unfortunately, our yard is not fully fenced. The perimeter has an okay fence, half chain-link, and half chicken wire. The wings, however, (the distance from the sides of the house to the property line) have no fence. Ours is one of the older homes on a narrow lot where the driveway runs all the way to the garage in the back. So the driveway and the other side yard are both wide open.
Okay. So there is a priority. In order to make our lives easier in other areas, let's fence off those two sides!
Fencing a driveway properly is no easy task, but when you're trying to contain a couple of energetic toddlers rather than a full-grown Great Dane, it's not as hard as it could be. We're not putting in a full 6-foot fence. Not yet, anyway. We bought two three-by-eight picket panels, which we will hinge and hang on 4-foot pressure treated posts. To keep them from sagging, we bought some gate wire kits. The kind that run from the top hinge corner to the bottom inside corner and keep it more or less square. If that is not enough, we'll attach wheels to the bottom. That will allow us to keep the full opening of the driveway, and yet we can keep the girls in the back.
Whew! Problem solved. And that will also allow us to do more without worrying about them getting out.
Funny, isn't it? How you think one thing is of such great priority, and yet you can't get very far on it because of a complication. The answer is often staring you in the face. Solve the lesser problem first, and that paves the way for an answer to the biggest problem.
Will having a fence instantly make it a breeze to do all my work? No. My kids are not cattle, I cannot just send them out for the day and expect them to stay out of trouble. But at least now I can weed and prune and work without worrying about them escaping. Jeff and I can clean the garage without constantly asking "where's Taea?", "Is Esther in front?", "where are the girls?"
Next year, I will have three to chase. I get the fence in now, instead of later, and save myself some hassle.
Balance. Consider your priorities. What are the problems you face? Would solving a lesser problem help solve a greater problem? Would signing your kids up for school lunch actually be cheaper than sending them with one, because you won't have to buy baggies, and pre-packaged drinks, etc, thus helping your family budget?
Are you wasting money every year tossing clothes that get damaged because you don't know how to sew? "But I don't have time for that!" you might say. It's not as hard as you think. And besides, what is quicker-spending five minutes doing up a popped seam, or spending two hours with your teenage daughter trying to replace that one-of-a-kind shirt because she refuses to wear anything else?
Lost weight lately? How much would you save if you could take in your skirts instead of buying a new wardrobe?
That is just one example! Balance your life! Try to find the areas where taking just a little time learning a skill will save you oodles of time and money in the future.
However, balance also includes taking time out to rest. We're human. We get tired. We can't just keep going constantly. In this recession, how much have we heard about taking a stay-cation instead of going somewhere new? Depending on where you live, chances are, you have some fantastic attractions within reasonable driving distance of home. Just make sure that if you plan a stay-cation, you STICK TO THE PLAN! Don't make a plan of going hiking in the local state park, and then the next day to the water park, and then a day museum-hopping, just to wake up the day of the vacation and dig into those storage boxes you've been meaning to sort. If you plan to relax, stick with the plan.
Is it wrong to work during a stay-cation? No, not really. Not if you plan for it. If you're planning on playing for most of the stay-cation, but reserve the last Saturday for that backyard patio you've been meaning for three years to put in, fine. Just make sure you don't wait until Saturday to get your measurements, and the materials, and rent the equipment, etc. Get all your plans in order BEFORE the work day, and it will go more smoothly.
Balance takes planning, but it also takes flexibility. Have a plan B in case that state park hike is washed out. Try a roller-skating rink, or go to an indoor pool. Go restaurant hopping, where you have a different course in each restaurant.
Try to find the balance you need in your life, and I think you'll find things going much smoother. Does that mean that if you plan everything, you'll have no problems? Not a chance! Life has lots of problems. A sign of good balance is that you're able to handle those problems without having to pop a pill, or spend the day in a mental institution. The whole trick of it is making sure that in your planning, you include ALL needs, not just the obvious ones. And make sure you prioritize properly. If you are stressed out, and it is really the niggling little problems that bother you more than the big ones, solve them first. They tell you in a disaster that if you have minor injuries, treat them before helping others. Why? Because they don't want those minor problems to turn into major ones! How dumb would you feel if you ignored a bleeding cut, and ended up being one that needed a stretcher because you nearly bled to death?
Find your balance! Make a plan! And try to have some fun on the way!